Joe Biden
Joe Biden is feisty. Joe Biden will fight. He’s only lacklustre when it comes to height. Ignoring the chilling and heart breaking howls that come from the depths of Bill Clinton’s fat jowls, he’ll front for Obama and take all the guff; if Playboy comes calling he’ll be in the buff. Republicans fear him and [...]
Talking or Quacking
Stick me with a needle or an enema propose but don’t suggest I listen to those medical talk shows! The doctors are so ghoulish they make Dracula look cute; no matter what the symptoms they prescribe some eye of newt. Their concern is never with the patient’s own welfare. All they want to know is [...]
Short Changed Again
The world is getting smaller is what people say & think– and they are right, by golly! when I watch my burger shrink. The Whopper isn’t whopping like it used to whop before. They’ve shrunk the meat, the cheese, the bun, and mayo is no more! And if you order pizza with a thin crust, [...]
Conventions
Conventions are a great way to let off much greenhouse gas. While delegates are spouting tons of rancid biomass. The candidates are chosen long before these vast events. So why they even hold them makes so very little sense. The television coverage sounds just like World War Three, but after watching just one night I’d [...]
Older than dirt
Leslie Stahl is growing older while Mike Wallace starts to moulder. Andy Rooney’s dull palaver makes him sound like a cadaver. CBS must not require anybody to retire.
Uncle Sam
Uncle Sam is handing out the money right and left if you are some big business and your profits are bereft. Automakers in Detroit hold out their big tin cup, hoping that there’s plenty in the trough on which to sup. I guess they’ll close if they don’t get infusions of new cash, putting people out [...]
Taliban
Snuffing out the Taliban is really very simple; you squeeze until they burst apart like any common pimple. The problem is that all the pus soon spreads a new infection to other countries where they can run in a free election. Voted in, they’ll clamor for their sacred Shia law and justice will be given [...]
Techno Food
Irradiated lettuce will be coming to your store to squelch those nasty beasties that into your innards bore. Salmonella soon will be a charming fairy tale as you snack on spinach and a salad of raw kale. Gamma rays mean freedom from the worries of disease; so have some soda crackers with irradiated cheese! Technology [...]
Money and Red Bull
Poverty is relative – unless you’re living in it. Then you’d trade for anything in a New York minute. Wealth does not bring happiness or so the sages say; but give me wealthy misery at any time of day! God throws money out his door to land on Earth wherever; those who stumble over it [...]
Take Two Escargot and Call Me in the Morning
The recipes in magazines sound scrumptious, I agree, but where to find ingredients they list — a mystery! They call for capers in rum sauce or powdered baby’s breath – and other stuff that you might get from witches in Macbeth. A double-boiler’s called for, and maybe a shad plank, cheesecloth and a centrifuge and [...]
