Timerick
Shut up, Michael Moore. You’re such an old bore. You don’t know the score. You make my ears sore. Rush Limbaugh, be still. You’re mentally ill. Go take a pain pill. We’ve all had our fill. Ms Oprah, drop dead. You live in your head. You make me see red. Some weight you should [...]
Short and Sweet
I won’t say the Chinese are on age matters big liars but when they get gold medals they are used as pacifiers. ********************* Tourists go abroad now not seeing any sights but for appendicitis and grievous overbites. ************************ Mitt Romney makes a nice VP cuz Mormons always race to win that all-important spot they call [...]
Bear (mother russia)
A hungry Bear is never safe; with two heads it just might smile at you with one of them as the other takes a bite. This Bear is on the prowl again and eating most of Georgia. Perhaps we ought to take a page from old Lucretia Borgia. Make his meal so poisonous he’ll long recall [...]
Bon Bons
The toothbrush is a noble tool, but not when it’s electric; I will not put into my mouth anything so hectic. **************** I’m thankful for my daily bread, but am not much a partisan of expensive slices which bakers lable ‘artisan’. ************************* The Sabbath is a day of rest, but only for the sinner. The [...]
Salt of the earth
‘The salt of the earth’ no longer is praise; since ‘sodium-free’ is now the catch-phrase.
Confession
Confession is good for the soul; on this I am perfectly clear. So when I find fault in my friends, I confess it to all that will hear!
The country is Going To Wal Marts
The country is going to Walmarts– and nobody gets to get out. The country is going to Walmarts– this message I scream and I shout. The White House is in the Toy Section, where plastic and lead paint abound. The congress and high court officials are in a box marked ‘Lost and Found”. The Pentagon [...]
Snore
When I retire to my rest there’s no use in ignoring the fact that window panes will shake from my loud steady snoring. I’m told the sound is something like two bullfrogs when they’re mating or similar to summer floods down in a sewer grating. I must admit that I sleep well no matter the [...]
Grandpa
Oh Grandpa won’t you come out please – it surely is most vital that you sit in a folding chair at our ballet recital. My child, the years have left me stiff and subject to lumbago; if I sit in a folding chair I’d turn into a Lego. Oh Grandpa, take us fishing please. We [...]
Lotion
There are lotions for your fingers. There are lotions for your feet. There are lotions that are facial and smell honeysuckle sweet. They have lotions for cornhuskers and the udder of a cow. Oh, they make ‘em out of beeswax and petroleum somehow. Then they put in aloe vera and some lanolin from sheep, there [...]
